


Watching Oz

by RhymePhile



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Banter, Gen, Humor, Wordcount: 100-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-27
Updated: 2006-07-27
Packaged: 2017-10-10 21:24:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/104440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RhymePhile/pseuds/RhymePhile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Elliot explains to Olivia why he watches the TV show <em>Oz</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	Watching Oz

  
She sipped at her coffee and sighed. "Stakeouts suck."

Elliot cocked a half-grin and stretched behind the wheel. "I don't mind 'em. Fresh air is good."

She made a face. "But stale coffee isn't," she said, pouring the rest of the cup out the window.

He sniffed at his and did the same.

"Oh, so I meant to tell you," she said, turning to him. "I watched this really crazy TV show last night."

"Since when do you have time to watch TV?"

"I don't...a friend gave it to me on DVD."

"Since when do you have friends?"

"Shaddap," she said, rolling her eyes. "It's this show about prison life that was on HBO, and..."

"You mean _Oz_."

She blinked. "You've seen it?"

"Sure, gives you a good idea of what goes on inside. I even think they might have even softened it a little."

"You're kidding...God, there's that one guy, the blonde..."

"Beecher."

"Yeah, Beecher, and that other guy, the Nazi..."

"Ayran Brotherhood."

"Whatever, him, and Beecher looked like he was going to be raped by that giant black guy..."

"Adebisi."

"Yeah, until that Nazi guy..."

"Schillinger, the leader of the Ayran Brotherhood."

"Right, he decided to 'save' him, but instead he made him his bitch!"

"Prag," Elliot said.

"What?"

"A bitch is a prag."

"Oh."

"And drugs are tits."

"They are?"

"Uh-huh."

"Then what are actual tits?"

Elliot furrowed his brow. "Um, hmm. I dunno. I never thought about it."

"Anyway, so Schillinger makes poor Beecher his bitch..."

"Prag."

"Prag, whatever, and then he tattoos a swastika into his ass!"

"Actually, he was branding him."

"Okay, whatever," Olivia said.

"And it was backwards. What's up with that?" Elliot asked.

"Backwards?"

"Yeah, you didn't notice?"

"I might have been hiding my eyes."

"You're hiding your eyes at _that_? Just wait until you get to the good stuff."

"Like what?"

"Oh, y'know, shankings, electrocutions, hangings, shootings, bricking a guy up in the wall, suffocations, drug overdoses, falls off the tier, falls down the elevator shaft, stranglings, neck-breakings, they nail a guy to the floor..."

"Shit!"

"Yeah," Elliot grinned. "That's a great scene, too."

"What is?"

"Beecher takes a shit on Schillinger's face."

"Really? Man, what did I get into?" She looked at him. "Why did you get interested in the show?"

"To watch the men kissing."


End file.
